This week has been challenging in more ways than one. I wondered how I would do with Steve at work now. There are so many things that I have learned in these few days. One, kids can drive you crazy. Well I already knew that, but that is just the plain truth and that has to remain my number one revelation. Two, I don't have to have the answers for everything. Three, not everyone is cut out for the roll of stay at home mom. Four, all things are possible with God. Another thing I already knew but need to keep reminding myself of the fact.


Interestingly, early this week a segment on the Today Show titled, I Love My Kids. I Hate My Life, appeared on someone's Facebook post. The segment, in my opinion, didn't really clarify a particular point. Maybe it was just me. It grabbed my attention because, if you read my adoption blog, you know that I was on my way to bigger and better things than this Mommy Business. Or at least that is what I had hoped. I had returned to school in hopes to finally finish. God impressed on me to deny my "self" take up my cross daily and follow him. He called me forward to Mommy Business. It is not always fun, not at all glamorous and definitely not something I dreamed for myself. I know I'm not alone. That said, I'm determined to allow myself to enjoy my journey. I find that society these days negatively influences the attitudes of stay at home moms. Before I go on about this, I truly admire mothers who both work and parent their children. What I hope to discover on this road before me are positive and encouraging views that say it's okay to love being a stay at home mom. Does that make sense?

I'm a mother and have been for twelve years. However, that time has been split between working, home schooling my daughter and going to school myself. So why now this determination to find joy in my mommy status. Frankly, because even though my twelve-year-old has turned out fine so far, I think I can do a better job! Not only can I do a better job, I can do it more joyfully! In some ways I think God has given me a "do-over" with the gift of my adopted daughter. Does that sound bazaar? It sounds like more work to me. But because of this"do-over" my oldest will benefit as well, so no fear there.

So where did all this come from? A book that has been calling me to read it for over two years now. I'm a reader and honestly haven't read a book for a couple of months now. I know, weird. I received a book from Compassion International, where we sponsor a child. This book has been sitting on my bookshelf along with many other books, most of which I've read. That fact may be why I have been drawn to this book. Whatever the reason, a couple of sentences jumped out at me. Excerpts follow:

Our most vulnerable citizens have become the world's most disposable commodity.

No matter what the setting, children seem to be a second-rate mandate. No matter what the ill of society, it tends to spiral downward and eventually land with its cruelest and most smothering impact on our littlest citizens. Small, weak, helpless, innocent, vulnerable, and trusting, they are the waiting victims for our simple neglect and most evil abuse. No matter what goes wrong, the little ones pay the greatest price.

Perhaps a little closer to home is the reality that children are the sacrificial lambs when our homes break up through neglect, anger, hostility, and eventually divorce.

You never stand so tall as when you stoop to help a child.

I don't know about you, but that just makes me want to do a better job in raising my children. So that is my agenda, not to just parent well, but to parent joyfully. Obviously, that will not always be the case, right? But it's worth a try.